thedanwray.com

“I just think of kurt popping out of that cake.  and mike with no eyebrows.” – he actually said this back in may, but i had to post-date it so it didnt give anything away…

“…i will however tear it in half and throw it in the trash can.”  (silence)  “i’m just gonna get it started with some scissors.” – the fate of a fake AAA membership he got in the mail.  it was thick.

“stay away from male on male smiley wink faces.” – she means emoticons ;)

“yeah, you owe me big.  that’s short for, you owe me big time.”

“how’s that heart disease doin for you today?” – everyone at fedex knows i eat fast food for just about every meal

“well i’m still able to stand upright.” – overheard this response to the typical ‘how ya doin?’ today at the grocery.

“my friends didn’t do anything silly really…we did steal a plant one time. a really big one too.  it was a pretty good sized plant…on it’s way to being a tree definitely!” – nice try, hun, but thats no Trustees Second East Semi-Annual Joel Reyes Memorial Television Drop.

“well if you’re anywhere near an exploding volcano… your ass better be on break.” – a good manager response when i asked him what the official fedex policy was on this particular disaster, after watching a video about disaster preparedness.

“well dont take her to sawyer, he’ll just make love to her” – you’d have to watch tonights episode of lost to understand.  and really, that probably wouldnt even help.

“and come July, I will pick up that controller for the first time in 3 years….  and after I ask you which buttons do what, I will take u down once again.” – a little rivalry between old college roommates.